Daily Show: Bush 'won't be satisifed until American children are eating roadkill'
The Bush administration's proposed $700 billion bailout of troubled investment firms got the Daily Show treatment on Tuesday, and Jon Stewart was particularly incensed by Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson's coy reluctance to accept the taxpayers' money unless his decisions on how to spend it are made "non-reviewable."
"Before we hand this Munster-esque unelected official 700 billion no-strings-attached dollars," Stewart remarked, "there is one thing you should know -- this financial guru never saw it coming."
"I've got great confidence in our financial market," Paulson stated last March. "Our markets are resilient, are flexible. Our institutions, our banks and investment banks, are strong."
President Bush also came in for his share of ridicule. "It turns out there are a lot of interlinks throughout the financial system," an apparently astonished Bush recently explained, illustrating the point with appropriate hand gestures. "Then AIG came along and the house of cards was much bigger. ... And so when one card started to go, we worried about the whole deck going down."
Stewart turned next to Daily Show analyst John Oliver, saying, "After Katrina, after Iraq ... I didn't think there was another area that these guys could screw up."
"It wasn't easy," Oliver replied. "It was like finding a vein on a failure junkie."
"Is this economic crisis, then, sort of the turd icing on this administration's shitcake?" Stewart wondered.
"Don't count them out, Jon," Oliver cautioned. "It's a long way to January."
"You think there's more out there?" Stewart asked. "What's left for them to -- decomplish, if you will."
"Do you still have a home?" Oliver asked. "Did your children have breakfast this morning? ... Was it something they found in the street?"
"You're saying the president here won't be satisfied until American children are eating roadkill?" suggested Stewart.
"Until they're fighting over roadkill," Oliver emphasized. "Until roadkill is the prize for the strongest."
When Stewart asked why Bush would possibly want this, Oliver explained that it was a matter of "legacy. ... We all know he'll never be ranked as the best president. But he could still, if he works hard enough ..."
"Be the worst?"
This video is from Comedy Central's The Daily Show, broadcast September 23, 2008.
Download video via RawReplay.com