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Bill Maher rips health care industry in 'New Rules' segment
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Published: Saturday September 29, 2007

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On his HBO show Real Time with Bill Maher, comedian Bill Maher came up with a few new rules citizens should follow. Freeing the health care industry from corporate pressures was top on his list.

"If you believe you need to take all the pills the pharmaceutical industry says you do," joked Maher, "then you are already on drugs."

Noting that it's that time in the campaign where all the candidates present their health care proposals, Maher pointed out differences in the leading Democrats' plans. "Hillary's covers children's teeth, Edwards has one that includes maintaining gorgeous, shiny hair, and Barack Obama's involves going on Oprah and everyone gets a gastric bypass!"

But Maher found fault in all three, namely that none could outlaw "unhealthy food, alcohol or cigarettes ... just pot, sadly." The host then lamented, "but none of the plans address the real problem: We won't stop being sick until we stop making ourselves sick."

Since Maher argued that "government isn't your nanny...they're your dealer, and they subsidize illness in America," he gave some prescient advice. "Ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you."

Some of his other new suggestions included a rule prohibiting 12-year olds from wearing cologne and a rule granting Dennis Kucinich's wife (tongue stud and all) the title of First Lady even if Dennis loses the Presidential bid. President Bush should make all of his appearances as a mime, as well.

The following video is from HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, broadcast on September 28, 2007